


Rest Your Head (Close to My Heart)

by obsessive-fics (xoPrincessKayxo)



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Babysitting, Domestic Fluff, Established Relationship, M/M, Plans For The Future
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-13
Updated: 2018-04-13
Packaged: 2019-04-21 23:02:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,044
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14295366
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xoPrincessKayxo/pseuds/obsessive-fics
Summary: Babysitting Pearl leads to a realization





	Rest Your Head (Close to My Heart)

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you to @phanarchy and @artlessdynamite for being wonderful betas and making this fic the best it could possibly be
> 
> (Title from Baby Mine from Dumbo)

Louise calls at seven am. Dan barely even hears it, just pushes Phil in his sleep the way he does when he’s trying to convince him it’s his turn to get the post. Phil sighs and reaches over him to get his phone.

“Hello?” he asks groggily, because seven in the morning without coffee means his brain is nowhere near on yet.

“Phil? Is that you? I need a favor,” comes Louise’s voice, breathless and panicked.

“What’s wrong, are the kids okay?”

“They’re fine, don’t worry. In fact… Would you mind watching Pearl? I have a really big meeting I didn’t realize was today. I can take Darcy in with me, but I can’t exactly sit Pearl on the floor with some toys,” she explains hurriedly.

Phil thinks about how he doesn’t know the first thing about being left unsupervised with a baby, but Louise sounds really worried. _It’ll be fine,_ he thinks to himself, but he’s not entirely sure he believes it.

“... Sure. Sure, you can bring her over.”

“Don’t worry, she’s a really easy baby. You guys are gonna be great at this,” Louise reassures him, and he wishes he had that much faith in himself. She says she’ll be there in about an hour, and the only thing he really registers from that is that he still has an extra hour to sleep.

* * *

“Why is there a baby in our bed?” is the first thing Dan asks when he wakes up.

Pearl is laying on her back in between them, chewing on one of her baby booties.

“Louise needed a last minute babysitter,” Phil explains, draining the rest of his coffee. Trying to make coffee while Pearl screamed to be let out of her carseat was difficult, so it’s quite possibly the worst coffee he’s ever made, but at least he’s caffeinated.

“And she called us?” Dan asks, but he’s already scooping Pearl up, and bouncing her on his knees, so he clearly isn’t all that bothered by it.

“Hi,” he’s cooing at her in that soft, high pitched voice reserved only for babies and animals, and it’s kind of a sight Phil wouldn’t mind seeing everyday. He very decidedly tables that thought for later, and stands up.

“I’m gonna go heat up a bottle, she hasn’t eaten today yet.”

“Uh huh,” Dan replies, but he doesn’t take his eyes off of Pearl.

Phil takes a bottle out of Pearl’s changing bag and puts it in the microwave. Kids weren’t something he ever thought of concretely- he always just figured they’d come eventually, with the house and the dog, but something feels right about heating up a bottle and bringing it upstairs.

“Do you want to feed her?” Phils asks, holding the bottle up. Dan is still bouncing Pearl, and she’s smiling a huge, toothless smile at him and babbling contentedly.

“Nah, you go ahead. I should probably actually get out of bed once today,” Dan says, handing her over to him, and heading for the bathroom.

Pearl starts screaming the minute she’s in Phil’s arms, but she stops when she sees the bottle, and holds out her hands expectantly. He sits down on the edge of the bed and holds the end of the bottle so she doesn’t drop it. Pearl takes the hand closest to him, and holds it up to his face, and she stays like that the entire time she’s drinking, staring at him and touching his face. Her hands are tiny, and soft, and she smells like… Well, a baby. All new and clean and like baby powder. She’s looking up at him with these wide, innocent eyes, and he’s a little bit in love with this whole situation.

“I’ve only ever seen you look at waffles like that,” Dan teases when he comes back into the room.

“Shut up,” Phil says automatically, but he doesn’t shift focus from Pearl. He needs to burp her now, so he puts the bottle down on the floor, and puts her over his shoulder the way he’s watched his friends who have kids do. He’s not really sure how long he’s supposed to do this, or if he’s tapping her back softly enough- he doesn’t want to hurt her. Pearl is completely silent though, so he guesses it’s okay. Finally, after what seems like forever, he hears her burp. It’s a strange sense of accomplishment, this feeling that he’s given her what she needs, but he likes it. He takes her down from his shoulder, and she knocks his glasses off his face, all the the while giving him that innocent, toothless smile.

* * *

Pearl does not like to be put down. They discover this fairly quickly- the plan was to put her down for a nap, make breakfast, and spend some time watching Netflix until she woke up. But every time they lay her down- on the bed, in her carseat… She starts screaming. And she doesn’t stop. Phil doesn’t know where she’s getting all of this energy, but she screamed the entire time they were making breakfast. He puts his bowl in the sink, and picks her up out of her carseat.

“Aren’t we supposed to… Let her self soothe?” Dan asks, watching as Phil paces the length of the kitchen, bouncing her up and down until she’s quiet again.

“Don’t care. I can’t take anymore crying- everyone in the entire building has probably heard her by now,” Phil answers, stopping pacing. Pearl yawns, and rubs her eyes, looking up at him.

“How can someone so little make that much noise?” he asks, to no one in particular. Pearl just yawns again, resting her head on his chest. It’s only been a few hours, and he’s already exhausted. Forget tv, at this point, all he wants is a nap.

“Here, let me take her,” Dan offers, holding his hands out, “I’ll try rocking her in one of the desk chairs.”

“Are you sure?” Phil asks hesitantly. He doesn’t know why handing her over feels like giving up.

“Yes, I’m sure. Go take a nap, you look exhausted.” And there was the magic word.

“Wake me up if you need me,” he says, relenting. He hands over Pearl and kisses Dan gratefully, before going to try and get some sleep.

Phil lays down, drifting in and out of consciousness. For some reason, he can’t get himself to just _go to sleep._ He keeps listening out for Pearl, for any sign that she needs to be held, or changed, even though he knows Dan would take care of any of that. And he keeps listening out for Dan, wondering if he needs help, if he’s just as exhausted and frustrated as he was before he came up here.

Eventually, he gives up. Laying down has made him feel a little more rested, even if he didn’t get a full nap. He finds Dan and Pearl in the gaming room, both fast asleep. He sits down and watches them fondly for a few minutes, before hitting mute and loading up a game.

“I thought you were taking a nap,” Dan yawns, blinking awake.

“I did. You two have been asleep for almost three hours now,” Phil tells him, pausing the game.

“And you’re playing Mario Kart without me.” Dan sits up carefully, as not to wake Pearl up.

“I thought she was never going to go to sleep,” Phil says, looking over at her relieved, “I should’ve known to just give her to you. You’re like a human space heater.”

“She loves you. How much longer do you think we have until she wakes up?” Dan asks, waving him off.

“Probably not that much longer. She’s going to be hungry when she wakes up.”

Pearl shifts, almost on demand, and the two of them freeze. She stretches her arms, and burrows into Dan again. They each take a breath, relieved.

“Is it weird that I’m kind of jealous right now?” Phil wonders, looking over at Pearl, content and sound asleep in Dan’s arms.

“Yes, that’s extremely weird. What are you gonna do when we have a dog?” Dan asks, his voice equal parts exasperated and fond.

“Or when we... have kids?” Phil replies softly.

Dan’s head snaps up at this, so quickly it’s almost comical. The thing is, Phil has never outwardly said the words, “I want kids.” Dan says it all the time, after a shy kid hugs them at a meet and greet, or a baby smiles at them on the train. He practically melts each time, says, “I can’t wait to have one.” And Phil’s never discouraged this- it’s what Dan wants, and he always, always wants Dan to have whatever he wants. He’s just… always been a little more scared of the responsibility that comes with being accountable for another human life. But something about today, about spending time with Pearl, by themselves, and actually being a lot better at it than he thought he’d be, has woken something in him. He’d always been kind of afraid to fully admit to wanting this unless he was absolutely sure he could do it. And he’s still not sure, one day isn’t enough time to be sure. But it’s enough time to decide he’s ready to let himself think about it.

“You…?” Dan starts to ask, but is interrupted by Pearl, who is now definitely awake. She blinks up at them slowly, before starting to fuss quietly.

“I’ll get the bottle,” Phil offers quickly, standing up. He heats up the bottle and brings it back inside.

“Take her?” Dan asks, holding her up. Phil nods, and sits down, taking Pearl in his arms. She holds out her hands for the bottle and he obliges.

“Maybe Louise should hire us as full time babysitters,” Phil jokes, because he’d kind of started a big conversation, and it’s his first instinct to deflect.

“We definitely don’t have the time for that,” Dan points out immediately.

“I know. This has been fun though,” Phil replies, looking over at him.

“Using our one day off this week to cater to the will of a screaming infant?” Dan asks, looking back at him.

“Yeah.”

“Yeah, it’s been really fun,” Dan agrees, smiling and holding a hand out for Pearl. She looks over at him, and wraps her hand firmly around his finger.

“I want one,” Phil says quietly, looking down at Pearl. Dan doesn’t say anything for a minute, just looks at him, and then down at Pearl, and then back at him.

“Me too,” he says, nodding quickly, “me too.” And then he kisses him deeply.

“Hey- not in front of the baby,” Phil teases, pulling away slightly.

“Really?” he asks, smiling. Phil smiles back and kisses him quickly.

“Really. Also, it’s your turn to change her.” Dan rolls his eyes, but takes Pearl, burping her as he walks.

They spend the rest of the day playing with Pearl and singing her nursery rhymes. She really is an easy baby, quiet and happy. A few hours later, Louise texts, letting them know she’s on her way back. Phil watches as Dan puts Pearl’s coat on her and places her in her car seat. He’s gonna miss her.

“You think Louise would let us babysit again?” he wonders, leaning down to make a silly face at Pearl. She smiles up at him, and reaches up to knock his glasses off.

“I don’t think she likes the glasses,” Dan teases, picking them up. Pearl just laughs more.

* * *

That night, they collapse into bed, completely exhausted.

“Rain check on earlier? I’m ready to sleep for a hundred years,” Dan yawns.

“Yeah.I wouldn’t mind another day like this though,” Phil says, looking up at the ceiling.

“Or everyday being like this?” Dan asking, looking over at him.

“Or everyday being like this,” he agrees, looking back. There’s a silent agreement between them then, that this is no longer an abstract, hypothetical thought, but a definite plan for the future. It’s exhilarating- terrifying and wonderful all at once. Like being at the top of a roller coaster and waiting for that first drop, your stomach in knots, your heart in your throat, just waiting for that moment, and knowing it’ll all be worth it.  Phil can hardly wait.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading! Hope you enjoyed it, and if you did let me know!  
> [read and reblog on tumblr](https://obsessive-fics.tumblr.com/post/172894107476/title-rest-your-head-close-to-my-heart-rating)


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